Sins
by Fading wind
Summary: Edward Elric did not believe in God. [RoyEd]


Title: Sins  
Genre: Romance/Angst  
Pairing: Roy x Ed  
Warnings: Shounen-ai/boy love. Spoilers for various parts of the anime.  
Summary: Edward Elric did not believe in God.  
Disclaimer: I don't own FMA. I own a copy of the _Good News Bible_ which I got my inspiration from. XD

**Sins**

Edward Elric did not believe in God. He remembered a time when he used to believe in God. That was when he was very very little, his mother taught him about God, and he was still too young to understand much, so he willingly prayed as his mother asked him to. But as he grew up, he sometimes heard his mother praying to God. She would murmur his father's name, over and over again, as she gazed out sadly into the the night sky filled with glittering stars. She prayed that her husband would come back soon to her. And sometimes she would break into sobs as she prayed, choking over her words. He would listen to her secretly, and clench his fists in hatred. He hated his father. Why did he leave his mother when she needed him so much? Why did he even marry her in the first place if he was to leave her alone like that, in distress? And he hated God too. God never answered his mother's desperate prayers. God was not as helpful and kind as He was known to be.

That was when he stopped believing in God anymore.

Once, when he was bored, he sat and wrote down a list of the sins he had committed that God would hate him for, if there was one. The very first one was the failed attempt at human transmutation when he was eleven years old. That had nearly cost him and his brother their lives. They were both extremely lucky to have survived.

And then he had caused a death at the same age. It was not of his own deliberate fault though. Some even said it was a pure accident. But Edward blamed himself for the man's death. He believed that he could have stopped the accident from happening.

When he was sixteen, he killed a man with his own hands. But, well, it was not really a man, but an artificial human. He killed a homunculus named Greed with his very own hands, and after that he had collapsed onto the floor and screamed, tormented by his guilt.

Just shortly afterwards, a whole _town_, along with some seven thousand men, was destroyed. Again, he had nothing to do with it, only he felt that he was the one that should bear _at least_ part of the responsibility for the huge loss. He felt that he could have done something to prevent the disaster. Actually, he did try and do something, only it didn't quite work. He had sent a note to Colonel Mustang warning him about what was to happen, but Mustang never listened to him.

Not long after that event, he killed another homunculus, the one named Sloth. She was the one whom he and his brother created. She looked remarkably like their mother, but he knew that she wasn't. Yet even so, it was a difficult task to kill someone that looked almost exactly the same as your own mother. He managed to achieve it nevertheless. There was much anguish in his heart, but he didn't show it. Someone else shed tears for him, and that someone else was the homunculus Wrath, the one who thought that Sloth was _his_ mother.

He had committed more sins than he could remember. He was sure that the things he had listed was just half of them. He had committed so many sins that he would certainly go to hell after his death, if such a place existed. He regretted committing every single one of them though. He was completely aware that he had done wrong, and he wasn't afraid to admit it. He wished that he could go back in time and correct them all, but it was impossible, he knew. It had all been done, and could not be undone.

But there was just one exception. There was one sin which he did not regret committing. In fact, he was very happy he had chose that path.

And that was to love Roy Mustang. In the Bible it clearly mentioned that God hated people who laid down with men as they would with women. He had done that. He was a homosexual, and homosexuality was a sin in God's eyes.

But he hardly cared. Loving Roy Mustang had made his life much better. He had found a true family. Roy was someone to rely on, someone to cling on to in dark times. Roy understood him better than anyone else. He belonged with Roy, and that was the only person he could ever love.

There was only that exception. Homosexuality might be a terrible crime in God's eyes, but in Edward Elric's eyes, there was nothing wrong with it in the least bit.

_The End_

**A/N: **I was reading the Bible during my Religious Studies lesson when I came across a certain verse in Leviticus, which is verse 18:22, which this drabble came out of. I actually wasn't supposed to be reading that bit of the Bible, but anyway, I was too bored, so I just flipped around the book looking for something more interesting. Please read & review!


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